mr. garrison ^*

• mr. garrison: evet bu soruya cevap vermek istiyen varmi cocuklar, cekinmeyin utanmayin hadi
  cartman: hede hodo
  mr. garrison: evet simdide daha az gerizekali olan birinden baska bi cevap alalim..
  --
• "mr.garrison : i have a lot of demons i need to face, father.
  babasi : what?
  mr.garrison : i need to know something.
  babasi : ok, like what?
  mr.garrison : all right, let's just cut right to it, i've come to ask you about the sexual abuse, dad.
  babasi : what !?
  mr.garrison : i have to know why.. right here and now, we're gonna talk about this.
  babasi : what the hell are you talking about?! i ve never sexually abused you.
  mr.garrison : i know!! i wanna know why not !!?!?!
• yazdigi kitapta yaklaşık birkaç milyon penis lafi geçen south park karakteri...
• 'south park bigger, longer, uncut' dan alinma:
  stan: mr. garrison, why are our parents so mad?
  garrison: i dont know maybe theyre in their period or something.
  wendy: mr. garrison, we think that was a sexist explanation.
  garrison: well wendy, actually i dont trust in anything that bleeds for five days and doesnt die.
• "how would you like to suck my balls mr garrison?" cartmanın bu lafı ile aklımda kalan south park karakteri
• homofobik bir imajla gayliğini gizlemeye çalışan,kötü bir vantrilok ve daha küçükken bile loser olan southpark karakteri.tek arkadaşı mr hat adını verdiği kukladır.
• küçük bi çocukken yetenek yarışmasına katılıp kathie lee gifford a yenilen, kathie tekrar kasabaya geldiğinde hemen koşup "you talking to me..? are you talkin to me? there's no one else around here, so you must be talkin to me" repliği ile dürbünlü tüfek satın alıp öldürmek için planlar yapan gözüdönmüş çiftkarakter.
• çocukken babası tarafından cinsel tacize uğramadığı için bunalıma girmiş,ama saolsun kenny g onu bu probleminden kurtarmıştır
• mr. garrison: lets start the day with a few new math problems. what is five times two?...come on children don't be shy, just give it your best shot...yes clyde?
  clyde: 12?
  mr. garrison: okay now lets try to get an answer from someone who's not a complete retard. anyone? come on don't be shy.
• tam adı herbert garrison olan ve her bölümde, şok eden açıklama ve yorumlar yapan gay ilkokul öğretmeni.
  
  -ladder to heaven? thats fucking stupid.